A struggle in serving others whether in ministry or relationships isn't the other people usually. It is my heart. When I read this in Relationships: A Mess Worth Making, it melted my heart to see the love of Christ and how such a contrast it is with our selfish hearts.
John 13:1-17
Circumstances Don't Determine Whether You Serve
One of my most common excuses for not being more loving and helpful is my circumstances. When you are weighed down with difficulties, what is the first thing you want to do? You don't want to do anything. You want others to do things for you. You want to be served, not serve. Again, I only have to look back as far as yesterday for examples. When my children press in on me the second they arrive from school, I am suddenly reminded of all my responsibilities. Don't they understand I have a job with many things to think about? Why do they insist that I help them with their homework immediately? Don't they see I have more important things to be concerned about than their assignments? These are the thoughts that race through my mind. Soon I feel convicted about my impatience and try to rationalize it. I would be more patient if I didn't have to worry about paying the bills and getting my work done. I would be a kinder, gentler father if they would be less aggressive and more obedient and restful. In other words, if my circumstances were easier, I would be a better servant. If I could take care of my cares, I would be more caring. In fact, my children just got home from school as I was writing this, and I was tempted to get irritable - again!
When we encounter Jesus in John 13, his circumstances are horrible. Jesus knew that the hour had come for him to die on the cross for self-centered sinners. He knew that the wrath of a just and holy God would soon fall on him. The just punishment for all his people's sins would crush him in just a few days, Yet what does he do? He serves. He does for his disciples what they should be doing for him. He takes a towel and a basin of water and begins to wash their feet. It would have been very tempting for Jesus to say, "Don't you guys know what is about to happen to me? Get a grip and comfort me!" Yet he says nothing about what is about to happen to him; he just serves, without self-pity. He is utterly self less at the moment it would be most tempting to be selfish.
That is not normal! Actually, it's downright miraculous, When our circumstances are difficult, it feels like a miraculous act to serve someone else, But that is what Jesus did, and he calls his followers to do the same. We should never minimize the humble service of one person to another; it is a sign of God's grace at work in a person's life.
Someone's Worthiness Does not Determine Whether You Serve
Jesus not only serves in the midst of his greatest crisis. he serves the very ones who don't deserve to be served. As Jesus' eyes scanned the room, I wonder what he was thinking. He saw Judas who would soon betray him and hand him over to the Roman authorities. He saw Peter, who would soon deny that he was ever associated with Jesus. The other ten disciples would use the feet he was washing to run for cover when Jesus needed them most. And yet Jesus got down on his knees and served them all.
It is tempting to use my circumstances as an excuse to avoid service. It is equally tempting to size someone up and decide not to serve because you don't think he deserves it or will appreciate it. You don't have to be in ministry very long before you meet self-centered people who think it is your job to respond to their every beck and call. There will be people for whom you pour out your life, who then turn around and say you haven't done enough. Those kinds of people really don't deserve my service. In fact, they drive me crazy!
Maybe you are the kind of person who thinks you can get along with just about anyone. If that is the case, you either haven't lived very long or you have been able to shield yourself from most other humans! But, eventually, someone will enter your life and push you to a place you have never been pushed. Or perhaps you are someone who has ventured into people's lives and been burned - badly. You have vowed never to place yourself in a vulnerable relationship again. You have become cold, careful, and protective. Jesus is calling you to move into people's lives and become vulnerable. He does not say it will be easy, but he does say that this is the only place to find life. You find your life by dying to yourself and caring for others in risky ways.
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