the love of Christ controls us

I often seek to limit "loving" people according to how much I am loved by them. Why? Would I feel pathetic for loving someone more than they love me?

I don't know how God does it...

Why do I not love according to how much I am loved by God period...

For the love of Christ controls us, having concluded this, that one died for all, therefore all died

-2 Cointhians 5:14